5.1 min readPublished On: September 28, 2023

The dad and daughter debate

Social Media and Mental Health

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the main event. In one corner, wearing white shirt and confident smile, is the challenger, Marc Robertz-Schwartz, a dad who wants to knock out social media, a foe he says is self-centered, ridiculous, and uninteresting that can be a detriment to mental health.

In the other corner, wearing the black shirt and a look of determination, is his daughter, Cadi Schwartz, who plans to work in social media and religiously uses social media to have fun, share and learn interests, and develop friendships.

Are you, the judges, ready to decide if social media is a force for good or a plague that adversely affects our mental well-being? Get your scorecards ready for the ultimate Dad-Daughter debate! They are ready to ruuuuuummmmmbbbbllllle! 

Marc: If you search for “Impact of social media on mental health,” on the web, there have been about a zillion medical, professional, and academic research studies on the topic. My perspective carries none of the weight of those studies, but rather is based on three fronts; personal, parental, and professional (my company manages several client accounts). While the majority of my personal use is limited to Facebook, it has been a blessing and a curse on all mental and emotional fronts.

Cadi: When I grow up, I want to work in social media. As a public relations major, it is my dream to work in social media for a professional sports team. Me and social media are a package deal nowadays and I love it.

Marc: On the positive side, it has helped me reconnect with some special friends of my past, rekindling both in-person and virtual relationships that had otherwise been lost. I celebrate their successes, share their losses, chuckle at the antics of both their kids and pets, and marvel at those who never seem to age. Unfortunately, I would say that represents about 40% of the joy and energizing emotions I feel when I’m scrolling.

Cadi: For me, social media represents my past, present and future. It allows me to learn and explore. I use social media to find new recipes, to laugh, to get my news, and to keep up with the latest trends. I use social media to keep up with organizations that I hope to work for someday. This hasn’t always been the case though. For years, there seemed to be this unspoken rule that social media was only used for showing only the good things. It was hard to see the people who seem to have the “perfect” life when things aren’t going right in yours. It’s easy to say they don’t deserve it or it’s not all real. In some cases, yeah, that’s true. But now, some people on social media work hard for what they have and don’t “create” fake lives, but use social media to “create” the lives they always imagined.

Marc: More often than not, I find political discourse, upsetting news stories (many of which I will take the time to source before reacting, engaging or reposting), baseless conjecture, or overall meanness and general stupidity to dominate my feed and elicit a visceral emotional response of energy-sucking anger – sometimes verbal, sometimes silent, both of which usually include the same words. I’ll be honest, I’ve blocked people, ignored invitations to connect or stopped following people who might otherwise rob me of some valuable balance.

Cadi: Now, I see social media from the professional side as well as from the personal side. I think it’s important to make this distinction to help maintain my mental health. Some overlaps are okay. For example, I am a sports fan and I want to work in sports. But being able to focus on one side while turning off the other has helped my mental health immensely. 

Marc: Even as an adult, I will on occasion, indulge myself in about 14 seconds of disappointment when I see Facebook photos of a gathering of people I feel are friends but who did not extend an invitation. Such disappointment fades quickly, with the tools of maturity and context that may be lacking in the younger generation. And that’s where the parental perspective kicks in. 

Cadi: On the personal side, I use social media to get my news, stay up to date on the latest trends and keep in touch with friends who I haven’t seen in a while. I also use it as an escape. I use it as inspiration for where my next trip is going to be, for laughing at memes and yes, watching “get ready with me” videos. On the professional side, I use social media as something to look forward to. Something to motivate me. Something to inspire me. 

Marc: As the father of this column’s counterpart, I am hyper aware of how much time she spends on multiple social media platforms. My wife and I held social media at bay for our daughter until she was 13 (hey, it was Facebook’s rule, not ours). But now she’s 22, a senior in college, and our influence is fading with the hopes that we have led by example and instilled some valuable tools to help her cope with whatever emotions she may feel while giving her scrolling thumb a solid workout. 

Cadi: I choose to see the good in social media. The part where it brings us all together. The part where it provides jobs for millions of people around the world, including me one day. Just like anything else in life, social media is all about perspective. 

Marc: Like anything, I think social media is about moderation and a conscious, deliberate effort to not let it overcome your well-being. Maybe easier said than done. “Like” if you agree.

Wow, what a slugfest! As the combatants return to their corners, it’s time for our judges to mark their scorecards and declare a winner. Judges, have you reached a decision?

Photos of Marc and Cadi by: Nicole Hamel

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